The AR-15 is Constitutionally Protected

By Mr. Greene

In today’s society we have a tendency to overcomplicate things. A good example is the silly debate over whether more modern firearm designs like the AR-15 are included as constitutionally protected “arms” under the Second Amendment. 

This should not be a complicated matter for anyone with even the most elementary understanding of the Constitution, the founding documents, and the principles of citizen empowerment and self-government that motivated our Founding Fathers to produce them.

There’s a reason why James Madison wrote the Second Amendment and why three-fourths of the States ratified it along with the rest of the Bill of Rights on December 15, 1791. It’s because the founders had lived under the tyranny of King George III. It is the reason they took up arms and fought an impossible battle against the most powerful military on the planet at the time. When the badass American patriots finally prevailed, that generation knew they must guarantee future generations would always be able to defend themselves against the aspiring tyrants that centuries of human history proved would come calling. This was about the “people” having the arms necessary to protect themselves against the government, not hunting or anything else.

The nutbags who argue that the Founders could have never intended to protect the people’s right to an AR-15 like this one and super scary-looking guns like it would have us all believe that Madison would have stepped up before Congress and made the following plea:


Today I ask that you join with me in the effort to forever enshrine the natural, God-

given right to arms in this great Bill of Rights we are establishing to forever protect the citizens

of this new country. We know the tyrants of the future will always equip themselves with the most modern and devastating arms technology available to them as they take their inevitable fights to the good people we seek to protect. They have always been vicious and evil. 

However, in order not to offend the sensibilities of the 21st century pantywaist, we must freeze the people’s arms technology to what we have available today in the 18th century.

Yes, this means that generations of American people we seek to equip for self-protection will not stand a fighting chance against the future tyrants we fear … but so be it. We cannot allow future pussies to be scared. Tyranny and the crushing of the human spirit that accompanies it is a small price to pay in order to ensure these future pussies don’t get anxious about what guns their neighbors choose to own.

Thank you for your consideration.

– J-Dog Madison

If you think this sounds remotely possible, you might want to ask your mother to grab you by the shoulders with both hands and pull your head out of your waxed ass. The other obvious historical point here is that pistols were prevalent during the time. If the founders really did want to restrict the arms capability of the people, they could have easily substituted “pistols” for “arms” in the text of the Second Amendment. They didn’t because it would have been stupid, and these dudes were anything but stupid.

This stuff just isn’t that complicated. So let’s all commit to making an effort to keep things simple. And a little less emotion wouldn’t hurt either.

Editor’s Note: Rifle shown is the YHM 57-XL Billet Carbine